What It's REALLY Like Being A Tall Girl | Why It's Such An Isolating Experience

Truthfully, being tall can be an isolating experience. I mean it's very rare to have a moment where you can just feel like everyone else. Whenever you walk into a room, you immediately get noticed and get stares. People feel the need to make comments about your height. You see that you fit, your friends are wearing, Yeah, you can't wear that because it's not long enough. Experiences like these do add up over time, causing us to constantly feel like the odd one out, like the world treats us differently because of something we can't control. After a while, we kind of start to wonder if there's a place out there for us or anyone who could just understand or relate or just literally, I don't know, just treat us like normal human beings. Today, I'll be breaking down why many of us tell women feel almost like this silent loneliness, and why we shouldn't downplay this or pretend like it doesn't affect us. So it's get into it. Good morning, everybody. You are currently listening to a tall Girls podcast hosted by a tall girl named India. I help everyone who's in today is doing super fantastic. Before I get into this episode, I do want to say, make sure you're following me on my socials at a Tall Girls podcast on Instagram, TikTok, and picture so that you could stay up to date on all of the latest podcast episodes can catch a glimpse of my everyday life. Also, feel free to leave me interview and let me know how tall you are. I'm genuinely curious. I also have a monthly newsletter, make sure you subscribe to that. Every single thing that I just mentioned is going to be linked in the description. Was that intro a bit dramatic? Honestly, no, because high school me, middle school me was feeling exactly like that and it wasn't cute. And I do want to say early on in this episode that I am not, you know, talking about this to complain about being tall or like downplay being tall or whatever, because I know there's probably gonna be people that's like, oh, you're just so lucky to be tall, like, and I'm like, okay, yes, Like being tall is a blessing. I understand that now. I view it as such now, But you know, being tall as a girl as a woman has its moments, Like obviously it was way worse when I was younger, but even now as an adult, even though I'm like a five year old adult. Yes I say that, five year old adult, But even as an adult, it has its moments. Just as an example, let's listen to this clip. As soon as you go in a grocery store as a toll woman, everyone looks at you double take, you know, which is fine, like we're all used to that. At this point. What becomes really exhausting and annoying is when I'm just trying to look at the frozen fruit and a group of people. First, one person walks sees me and their eyes like widen, and I'm like, yeah, I'm really tall, and I just kind of like look away. And then their friend walks up and they grab their friend and it's like hey, now you're like okay. They grab their friend and they're like so tall, so tall, and like, I would be lucky if that happened to me once a day, but unfortunately it happens at least two or three times in every single store that I go to. And at that point, I think, too, it's hard because I would rather have somebody come up to me and ask me all questions. Yes, I played volleyball, No, I didn't play basketball. I'm not physical enough for that. My parents are six five and five ten. I don't have any siblings. I yes, the dating pool is hard, Like I would so much rather sit there and have that conversation. And maybe that's just because I do enjoy talking to people, because believe it or not, I actually am normal. But it's hard when you feel like everyone's talking about you. And it's actually true because everybody can relate to the feeling of being talked about, and it's uncomfortable and you get self conscious. But imagine that every single day, every single person you pass in every single social situation, or if you're literally just waiting in line at the grocery store. But yeah, as I said a little bit earlier, this kind of highlights the idea that, you know, sometimes we feel like outliers, we feel like the odd ones out. And it really goes to show that being tall can truly affect you socially, like in your social life, in social situations, especially just in the general public, like in just the regular public area. I'm talking like public transit, libraries, coffee shops, malls, grocery stores, et cetera. And you know, people's eyes are almost always on you, especially when you first enter the room and listen. It's normal, it's nothing crazy because I don't know. People's eyes tend to gravitate to like things or people like moving in their line of vision. And when that person like first walks in, yes, the eyes are going to be on them, or even just a tall person because you know, we're more noticeable. And I feel like that's normal, but just a glance or just to look fine. There are people who stare as you continue walking, stare you down low key and even sometimes visibly talk about you while they're staring at you and pointing at you. It's yeah, it's that bad. And honestly, this reminds me of this time where we went to Tell Girl Brunch period we Love Tall Girl Brunch and it was me Whitney Solange and this involves to Launch specifically by the way, she's at Glamison Underscore eleven on the social media platforms period, go check her out, love her. And we were going to the train station and she was wearing heels, and just for context, she is six to two without heels, without shoes, so with the heels she was probably about six or flour or whatever. So we're standing in the subway waiting for the train, just vibing or whatever. And you know, I am pretty hyper aware of my surroundings. That's just how I am. And you know, I typically, like, you know, I'm focusing on the conversation, of course, but I typically look around fairly often. And something that I noticed is that there were a lot of people staring at her, you know, to me that to me, I guess, to me being around her, it wasn't like anything insane or anything, because I don't know, I guess I'm tall and I was just with another tall girl. Plus I've also met all of them before. I met her before, so I was kind of used to her, I don't know, whatever. But there were people staring at her. I'm talking to stare at her down Like there was short ladies that were standing like probably a couple of feet away from us. And I'm telling you, one of the homegirls was looking to Laune up and down. And I'm like, oh, but this is just one instance that happened to one tall woman. Like, imagine how many other instances one tall woman has like this, or how many instances combine that other tall women have had, you know what I mean? And I feel like that could be very uncomfortable, especially if you have social anxiety. I think being tall and having social anxiety is probably one of the worst combinations you can have. That anxiety already makes you feel like all eyes are on you, but then on top of that, your height is basically screaming, hey, look at me. Having anxiety and being tall does now go together. It is stupid. It's a horrible combination, Like who make that up? When you're anxious, the last thing you want to do is stand out. You want to blend in. You want to go unnoticed. You want people to forget that you exist, that you're alive, that you're even there. But when you're tall, you don't really. Like blend in, And then everybody loves to point it out you're so tall. Like, dude, you're not helping. It is so awkward. Already, being like a tall girl is pretty awkward because you feel like a giant next to everybody else, Like all the. Girls are normally pretty short for the most part. I'm always like the. Tallest girl, like in whatever group I'm in, and I'm not even like six feet tall. I'm just five eight. And it's not just that I'm tall, but a lot of the girls are super short, like not normal short, but like below average. Is awkward. And then on top of that, you have the random strangers that have the audacity, the courage, the boldness to ask you or say the dumbest things. And then the jokes, ugh, the jokes. Can we please stop making stupid jokes about tall women in their height? It's not funny, it's not cute. You're not funny, You're not cute. And I'm talking about the people making the stupid jokes, not necessarily you, but like the Lakers called, they want their center back, like shut up. I think all the jokes against tall women are not funny, and they're actually quite insulting, and they're not ways of flirting, but ways of continuously making fun of O. But like the constant comments, the stupid jokes, the stairs, the pointing, the visibly talking about you and saying stuff about you and so forth, it adds up over time, and it can it can be pretty, it can be pretty intense. You know, it can make you feel bad. And but these are like strangers, they you can ignore them. You'll likely never see them again, you know. It just his different when those things come from friends, quote unquote friends or people that you're close to, even family members, because family members are notorious about making comments about your body okay, not even just your height, just your body in general and every other aspect of your life but whatever. And you know that's something that I personally really struggled with when I was younger, more so the friends part rather than the family part, because you know, I felt like, because I felt like that one tall friend, that one tall girl in the friend group, everywhere we went, I was the tallest one. I stuck out like a sore thumb. I looked like I could be the friend group's mom or older sibling because, to be honest, like, even though I was tall, like I've visit looks young. But you know, because you're taller, people just assume that you're older. So I would probably say more so older sibling, older sister than the mother part, but still I was that much taller than them. But like their comments really stung because I'm pretty sure you know, the younger people, kids, especially middle schoolers, like they have no filter. They're the rudest human beings ever. Okay, and you know, they would say a lot of things that just made me feel like I looked stupid, I looked goofy. I especially because they like to call me lanky or goofy or goof or dufus. Also got the turn doof or dufus from family members too, which is pretty outrageous, but whatever. But I also especially comments about my clothes because you know, I'm not like a big clothing person, not really a big fashion person. I'm not really like that's just I'm just not really into that, to be quite honest, and that's perfectly fine. Part of it, I feel like stem from when when I was younger, because you know, my friends were able to wear the glittery stuff, the glittery dresses and the little skirts and the hot pink shirts and all that stuff from Justice. Justice was the thing back in the day, back in the day, as if that was like thirty years ago anyways, but Justice was the thing during my middle school time, and all the girls would be able to wear those clothes and look super flying it and whatever, and I was just there, like in my JC Penny clothes that you know, thirty year old forty year old moms would wear. Not to say that there's anything wrong with that, but I was told several times that I was just like a grandma, quite literally, And if you told me that now, I'd be like, I don't care, you don't buy my clothes, shut up. But I mean, I feel like as you get older, you just place less judgment on people because you know, we all know each other's situations anyway. So I'm going off on a tangent. But back then, when they would tell me that I would dress like a grandma, several times, I felt really bad. But that's the only thing that was able to fit me that time. Because I was tall for my age, I couldn't shop in the same sections as them, and you know, those types of comments, especially with my clothes among other things, just got a little bit worse as I got into high school. But then on top of that, as I got closer to high school, the situation with the boys. Ugh, boys, Ugh, I mean, okay, let me stop, let me stop. But you know what I mean, You know what I mean. Okay, especially like in high school time, where it was often I wouldn't say necessarily known, but it just went around that like, but it was kind of known, kind of in the back of your head. That's like, oh, guys, don't want girls who are taller than them, Like that's just the whole notion at around that age, at the younger age. So, you know, being tall, being taller than most of the guys at my school, I already felt like insecure about my height from the previous years. But then on top of that, I was like, oh my gosh, like I had this crash and he's not gonna like me because I'm taller than him and he's gonna think I'm too tall and he's been thinking of me as one of the guys and da, da da. Honestly, I'm so glad that I was not allowed to date in high school because that was a time. I know now that the focus should not have been that, but you know that was my thoughts as a tall teenager, as a tall teenage girl, but I mean it is what it is. Dating as a tall girl is a very interesting situation, interesting type of thing. You just gotta find, you know, somebody who is into that and is to you and doesn't really care about height. You just got to be aware of the fake ones that pretend they're into your height but aren't. Actually, Yes, there are fake ones out there. Apparently there are guys out there who claim that they're into tall women or just try to make it seem like the height isn't a big issue and then go and try to forbid their tall girlfriends from wearing heels. Oh do you hear that? That's an insecurity alert. Tall women don't make you feel short. You make yourself feel short. That's something internal that you need to work on. You're the same person that you were when we walked up. We're just taller than you. It's okay, woo woo woo, woo woo woo. And yes, this is a fur referral thing. Just take a listen to this clip. How tall are you? Five eleven? Would you ever date someone shorter than you? I did one time? How tall were they? Damn? Yeah? But he like kind of had a god complex. The five to seven dude had a god god complex. Yeah, I could ever cute shoes. You wouldn't let me wear my heels. He wouldn't let you wear heels? Like ever? Like, what about like a formal attire? Speakers, sneers, clippers kind of grew? Do you still talk to him? But yeah, just being perceived as a tall woman can be extremely exhausting. It can be extremely draining. You almost always have some type of label on you, whether it's masculine, intimidating, aggressive, some people assuming that your trans no tin, no shade if you are But why is that an assumption for many tall women? I don't know, potential athlete modeled this that the other. It's just so much, and and you know, it can get pretty exhausting, especially when it feels like you're constantly fighting for yourself, like you have to constantly defend yourself or just put a shield up against the judgment and the mistreatment and the microaggressions and the stairs and so forth and so on. And you know, society teaches us from a young age that I'm glad things are changing now, but we still do have a ways to go, a long way to go. But society teaches us that, you know, in order to be accepted and to even be attractive, seen as attractive as a woman, you have to be smaller, you have to be petitue. And we already go against that, you know, because of our height, because naturally we're tall, so we're already comparing our heights to our peers. We're already feeling self conscious about it. We already feel bad about it, and so forth we're seeing the shorter girls on social media and the adorable outfits that we can never wear. We're constantly sticking out in the crowd, we get unwanted attention, and these experiences do add up over time. It's easy to feel like we don't belong anywhere, especially among other women. It's easy to feel like the on one out, to feel like no one gets us, no one understands us, and will always just be that one tall girl in the back of the photo that's just in a basic fit because clothes aren't long enough for us, or that girl who gets rejected because of our height because we're too tall our partner, our potential partner sees us as too tall for them and they don't want to be with someone who is taller than them, or that one girl who gets made fun of because of her height. Truthfully, being a tall woman can just be a very isolating experience when it feels like nobody else can relate to you, when it feels like the people around you are significantly shorter than you around the same height, and you're just 're just that one significantly taller person compared to them. And you know, it really does get to you over time, because you know, when you hear these comments, when you get these stairs constantly and so forth, you already feel bad about your height in general. But then when people, other people external factors start, you know, kind of not only projecting their insecurities onto you, because truthfully, some people have insecurities and project that onto you to make you feel like you're the problem, when really they have the problem. But when people are projecting their insecurities onto you, or just making comments, asking questions, the same questions over and over, just from different people and so forth and so on, that that is just such a draining thing to experience, and it can feel like so much and it feels like, dang, like is it really that bad? Like is there really something wrong with me for so many different people to be acting this way towards me simply because of my height? Like dang, like, leave me alone, you know what I mean. So, just as I said in the beginning of this episode that you know, like this is not to complain or anything about being tall, being a tall woman and stuff like that, because I think that being a tall woman can be an amazing thing. But I just wanted to say to the tall girlies, like, if if you feel this way, you're not alone at all. We've all been through it, we're all still going through it, and we're all probably still going to be going through it years down the line. But there is a whole tall girl community out there waiting for you with open arms. I'm here for you. You got a Tall Girls podcast. We're all in this together. What's the song? We're on this together. We're gonna band together and we're gonna get through this together. All the tips, all the tricks, all the hacks, all the rants, all the complaints, everything, We're gonna where. We got to stick together and we're gonna do this here weod. I did run a poll over on Instagram and just a quick plug here. If you want to participate in these polls and have your opinions heard on these episodes, make sure you follow me on Instagram at a Tall Fus podcast. But I did ask you guys in a poll, do you feel like there's a real community for tall women. Forty seven percent of you guys said yep, a strong one too. In fifty d three percent of you guys said no, being tall feels a bit isolating. Okay, like the fifty three percent saying that being tall feels isolating, that kind of validates the whole thing of this episode. How it can feel isolating, how it can feel lonely, just feeling like nobody understands, nobody can relate, people downplaying our emotions, our feelings, our experiences even But dang, like I thought I thought more people were gonna say that there's a strong talk about community out here, Like I don't know, maybe because I've been involved with this podcast, so I've been actively at it for almost four years now, about four years now, so like I see it, But maybe some of you guys just aren't super aware of it. Maybe we need to be more vocal about that. But that's very interesting. I didn't think that more people would say that being told feels a bit isolating. Let me know, let me know your thoughts about this in the comments or even in a DM. Anyways, we're gonna end this episode on a question, what is the dumbest thing that anybody has ever said to you? Because you're a tall girl, And no I'm not talking about the oh my gosh, you're so tall? Do you play sports? Like why do not you play. No, I'm talking about something so horrible that it literally keeps you up at night. The comment, oh my gosh, you're so tall, like you make me feel so tiny, Like literally know something about that comment nauseates me and I don't even know why. So yeah, let me know what you. Let me know if you agree with that in the comments. Let me know what's the dumbest thing you've heard in the comments. Let's talk about it. Let's chat about it. Let's trauma bond over it. That was such a weird thing to say. But as I said before, I'm gonna keep saying this episode is not to look for sympathy or pity or complain or anything like that, because they're gonna be out there they're like, uh, it's not that deep and oh, like I would absolutely to have your head. The amount of people who commented and have it really shows that, hey, I have not listened to the episode at all. Number one, this is meant for tall girls. If you're not a tall girl, you can't relate. Why are you making such a comment? Number one? And number two, it does have an effect on us and our self esteem, especially when you're growing and developing and you just feel so different, and you just don't know. You just don't know yourself. You don't know how to be. You like, confidence develops over time and you just don't know how to navigate it. Your body's changing, your mind is changing constantly, and you know, even adults are like saying these things to you over and over and you're in like your developmental stages and you just feel so bad about it. You internalize it and it carries you like it carries with you, it goes with you for the rest of your life. So yes, it is that deep. Don't try to invalidate any of our feelings. Thanks, but this episode is not to get sympathy or anything of that sort. It's simply just trying to make sure that you know, any tall girl listening to this, why now, any tall women listening to this right now, they just like just to help them understand, like, hey, you're not the only one, You're not alone, and your experiences are valid and your feelings are valid. So yeah, just putting words to a feeling that many of us have been carrying silently. So thank you so much for tuning into this episode. I really appreciate it, and I appreciate you as always feel free hit me up on my socials at a Tell Girls podcast. They're all going to be linked below, And let me know what you thought about this episode and just your thoughts, even your experiences. Let's share our tall girl experiences. What's like the dumb jokes that you've heard, what have people said about you? What are instances where you know you felt really uncomfortable with your height, especially in public, all that good stuff. Let's share them, and you know, just really let's just talk about it. Let's have a chat. And yeah, I really appreciate you guys, And I'm so glad if you listen to the end of this episode, and I'm so gold if you've been here since the first days of this podcast, and even if you're just joining us, like I really truly do appreciate you listening and just tuning in and sharing your thoughts and experiences. And yeah, until until I hear from y'all, I'll catch all in the next one. Good night and goodbye.