Why Do Tall Women Minimize Themselves for Others? | People Pleasing Tendencies in Tall Women

If you're a tall girly or honestly a tall person in general, tuning into this right now, listen to these next few questions and let me know your answers, either in the comments or you can send me a DM. At any point in time, have you found yourself slouching around shorter people? Have you ever volunteered to be in the back of photos or even bend down in photos with shorter folks? Has someone ever made a comment about you wearing heels and you chose not to wear heels because of that comment? If you answered yes to any of these questions, these are examples of minimizing yourself for the comfort of others while they seem very small, which yes they are. These actions kind of reflect people pleasing tendencies. In today's episode, we're going to be talking about how tall women are often taught from a very young age to minimize themselves, prioritize other people's comfort, and develop people pleasing tendencies around their height, which is going to make more sense as I get into this episode. So without further ado, let's get into it. Good morning, everybody. You are currently listening to a Tall Girls podcast hosted by a tall girl named India. I hope everyone who is sitting in today is doing super fantastic. Before I get into this episode, I do, and I say, make sure you're following me on my socials, at a Tall Girls podcast and Instagram to TikTok impinture so that you can stay up to date on all of the latest podcast episodes can catch a glimpse of my everyday life. Also, feel free to leave your review and let me know how tall you are. I'm genuinely curious. I just love a monthly newsletter makes you subscribe to that. Everything is going to be linked in the description. I hope everyone is doing fantastic. As I talked a little bit about in the intro, we're going to be discussing how many tall women grow up to be people pleasers, more so around their height rather than the generic version of being a people pleaser. And again that's going to make more sense as the episode goes on. But I also am going to be discussing how our upbringing plays a huge role in that. Growing up tall definitely has a huge impact on our personalities as adults. Many of us have grown a tough skin from our past experiences, matured faster or develop to resilience, while others maybe became more reserved, overly accommodating, or very focused on how other people perceive them. How is growing up tall affected the type of person you are today. There's actually a TikTok video, a very interesting one that talks about this idea and more so from the stance of how growing up as a tall girly can turn many tall women into people pleasers as adults, or lead them to have people pleasing tendencies when it comes to their height. So let's take a listen to. That many tall women end up being people pleasers and the reason why may surprise you. When you grow up tall, you become aware of yourself very quickly. You're the one always in the back of every group photo and you know your place. You're the one people notice before they even get to know you, so you learn really fast to read a room. You notice who's staring, who may feel uncomfortable by your presence, and who's about to say something or ask a question about your height, and without it and realizing it, you adapt. You lead with warmth, You make yourself more approachable, and you try to put people at ease before they even interact with you. This can look like kindness, but deep down, it's also about managing other people's comfort Over time, that turns into always thinking about everybody else first, prioritizing the comfort of others over yourself or even over extending when the situation doesn't warrant it. So, if you're a tall woman who's been the nice one, it might not just be your personality. It may be a combination of personality and something you learned in a world that made you hyper aware of yourself and others from an early age. Now, let's read some of the comments under this video. One tall Gurley said, why does this make so much sense? I hate being a people pleaser, making myself smaller for people. Another said, as a six' to two, WOMAN i feel so. Validated another said this is spot on for. Me, however not everyone necessar saroly feels this. Way AS i said, earlier you, know growing up as a tall girly can definitely affect your personality into, adulthood and that's not going to look the same for. Everybody another person in the comments section, Said i'm tallaf and the opposite of a people. PLEASER i stand up front, now especially IF i have a cute outfit. On so not all tall women grow up to have these people pleasing tendencies around their, height but even as said in the, video to an, extent growing up tall can turn you into a people. Pleaser the years of laughing off jokes and comments about our, height physically shrinking ourselves and adjusting our personality so we don't come across as too much taught us from a very young age that is our responsibility to manage other people's comfort when our height makes them feel. Uncomfortable so for, context a people pleaser is someone who constantly prioritizes other people's needs and opinions over their, own often at the expense of their own well. Being is often driven by fear of rejection or, conflict and the other person ten to seek external, validation and we often see this in family dynamics like in parent child, relationships or even in workplace, settings where the people pleaser will suppress their emotions over, apologize have a hard time saying no so that they can essentially please others or not make the other person feel, uncomfortable or make sure the other person isn't mad at, them so, forth and so. On i'm pretty, sure you get the, picture but being a people pleaser when it comes to your height or in relation to your height is a bit. DIFFERENT i feel like this is definitely almost like a part two to my last. EPISODE i think my last episode was more so talking about how tall women's height a tall woman's presence often makes people feel. UNCOMFORTABLE i don't. Know SOMETIMES i feel like maybe the wording of that was like a little bit weird Because i'm, saying, oh tall women are making people feel, okay maybe it look like a little bit of a clickbaby, title BUT i honestly think it's more of people are uncomfortable by a tall woman's presence rather than a tall woman's presence makes or a tall woman make that person feel, uncomfortable you know. Whatever it's all about wordplaying and how people take. It it doesn't. Matter but, ANYWAYS i feel like this episode is a little bit of like a part two to last week's, episode WHERE i was talking more so about guess, again How atoleoman's presence makes people feel uncomfortable and how they react towards us and how they treat, us and how they react to our, height to our presence because they feel uncomfortable and how that affects how they treat. US i guess now this is more so talking about how we respond to, that how we respond to the other person's, discomfort especially if that person is a quote unquote friend or if it's a family, member maybe a significant, other because especially if we are still insecure within, ourselves but also if we care about that person and we want them to be in our, lives some of us may overcompensate or exhibit people pleasing. TENDENCIES a great example of this Is i've also seen like a couple of TikTok videos on. THIS i, mean whether or not it's, true, whatever But i'm pretty sure you, know tall women have definitely said stories about. This but a significant, other it's date, night they want to go. Out the tall woman is maybe the same height as her significant other or taller than the significant, other and she wants to wear. Heels the tall woman wants to wear heels on this, date and or maybe it's to meet other. PEOPLE i don't, know it. Depends. Oh ACTUALLY i also saw on A reddit it was like this tall woman was going with her boyfriend and me his, family something like, that and the significant other will be, like why are you wearing, heels or basically try to tell them or convince them to not wear heels because they don't want that tall woman to be taller than, them or around the same high as, them or JUST i don't, know. Taller in, general it essentially may make them feel uncomfortable that the tall woman is wearing, heels and so the tall woman will not wear heels to ensure that the significant other is comfortable on that outing or that date, night even though she really wants to wear heel and it compliments her outfits so. Well something, else something That i'm actually very guilty, of is laughing off comments and jokes about your. Height so maybe your peers or your friends or whatever makes like a joke or something just like, backhanded just says something extremely backhanded about your, height and instead of, saying, hey that's not, nice it's actually kind of rude or, whatever you kind of just like laugh with them and agree and don't say anything so that you don't come off some type of way or appear to be a bully or mean or aggressive or. Whatever these are just a few examples of people pleasing tendencies in relation to our. Height these are the things that we do to make other people feel comfortable being around, us or be accepted by, others so that we can avoid, conflicts so that we can avoid, rejection so that we can have some sort of validation maybe from other people and they won't treat us a certain, way or so that we can know, like, oh like now this person isn't uncomfortable by my. Height essentially doing things that we don't necessarily want to do OR i don't know isn't good for us to do so that the other person they can be accepting of. Us and this is learned at a younger. Age right when we're, nine, ten, eleven, twelve we laugh off those comments or jokes about our. Height we are often told to stand in the back of class. Photos, Right we're often told to be the bigger and more mature, person even though the other person is like the same age as, us but because we're, taller we're like expected to be more mature because they see us as. Older we do these things so that we can be accepted by our quote unquote, friends be accepted by our, peers be accepted by our family, members be accepted by our, crush our shorter, crush our significant, Other and to a. Degree we're doing these things at the expense of our mental and even physical. HEALTH i mean slouching and our posture is a good example of how we do these, things how we minimize ourselves at the expense of our physical. Health our posture is a great example of an expense that we pay in the long run to minimize. Ourselves so here's. Something THAT i am on learning and working to. Fix so growing up in an environment where being tall was seen as a masculine, trait like as a, woman you should not be, tall you should be short and petite and. Small So i've always been taught my whole, life AND i didn't want to be seen as that masculine. Thing SO i just naturally like slouch and, like you, know shrink myself to be more, like, okay. Smaller And i've done it so much that is now a part of, me and it's messing up my. Posture and recently someone took a, picture an off guard picture of, me AND i saw my. POSTURE i literally. SCREAMED i was, like oh my, goodness that can't be HOW i look WHEN i, stand LIKE i look like some type of. Alien like it just did not look. GOOD i just more so want this to be an awareness. Episode if you're a tall woman and you find yourself speaking in a higher pitched, voice or downplaying your, height or trying to like laugh off the comments and the, jokes or not wearing heels because you don't want to make other people feel uncomfortable around you because of your height because you'll be towering over, them or honestly anything else that really isn't true to. You if you're doing any of, THAT i just want to start off by saying it is not wholeheartedly your. Fault, okay we are taught that even as women in, general we're often taught to be people. Pleasers but again we're talking about this in relation to our height and being tall and so. Forth but we're taught this at a very young age that we should be managing other people's comforts and we shouldn't be trying to come off some type of, way or we shouldn't stand up for ourselves when people are bringing us, down or we should do things so that other people are not like intimidated by. Us we should be doing things so they're not, scared so that they don't think that we're, aggressive and so. Forth when, honestly, Like i'm, sorry but wearing heels is not. Intimidating wearing heels is are TALLMENT i don't find. THAT i, mean maybe it's because of whole woman, Myself but how is that like intimidating for other? People how is that scary or aggressive for other? People you know WHAT i? Mean how is standing up for yourself when people are like saying these things about your, height about your body like intimidating or? Aggressive you know WHAT i? Mean but, again we're taught this at a younger, age you, know when we're in middle school and when we're in elementary, school in high. School even, so those are the things that we carry into our, adulthood that we continue to minimize. Ourselves and, listen many of us grow out of. It many of us realize, like, hey this is, weird this is. Wrong i'm going to be more true to myself and if other people don't like, it then screw, them you know WHAT i. Mean but there are some of us who don't grow out of, that who don't realize that we're doing these. Things and you, know if you're tuning into this, episode if you're listening to this episode and you're, realizing, hey LIKE i actually do that in my day to day and that's not WHO i am as a. Person then today is day. One you. Know the first step to, change the first step to, growth the first step to fixing a quote unquote problem is realizing that there is something wrong. There, so you, know if you realize that this is, happening that you're doing, this then now it's your job to kind of just like see how you're going to, Change see how you're going to be the person that you want to be and do the things that you want to, do hopefully not to the expense of other, people of, course but also not to the expense of yourself and your own mental health and your own physical. Health and if that means that you have to lose some people along the, way then so be. It it's your. Life you have a long life to live with, yourself and it really shouldn't be it really shouldn't be spent just only managing other people's comfort and so. Forth maybe that was a tiny bit, Intense so we're going to end off with a little bit of a positive. Note, honestly we'll end off with a positive. Question what is your favorite part about being a tall. Woman all, right we're going to end the episode. Here thank you so much for tuning. IN i really appreciate, it AND i appreciate you of. Course that's always feel free to hit me up on my socials at A Tall girls. Podcast let me know what you thought about this. Episode do you find yourself minimizing? Yourself do you find yourself doing these people pleasing? Tendency because if you're high in relation to your, height of so why let's have a conversation about. This did you realize this before and you're kind of scared to like change or appear some type of way to? Others are? You are you scared about other people's? Perceptions do you think that we're taught at a young age that we should be minimizing ourselves and we carry that into our. Adulthood do you think they're growing up tall affects our personalities as. Adults let's let's talk about. This let's have a conversation about. This you can comment. BELOW i KNOW i really have to get to these, COMMENTS i really. Do you could comment, below you can send me A dm even and, yeah let's Chat and until THEN i will catch you guys in the next. One good, night and goodbye