The Dating Double Standard: Are Tall Women Undesirable In The Dating World?

Dating as a tall woman. That is such a beautiful thing. Okay, on the low, Growing up, it was kind of awkward, well for me at least. I've had a total of three questions in my lifetime, two of which were in middle school, and I was taller than both of them. Okay, not like a million inches taller, but just enough where you know, there's a height difference, and it was awkward. And then on top of that, it was already an awkward time of my life. I mean, middle school is probably an awkward time for every single person, right, But through my middle school years, I'd see them with their girlfriends who were always shorter than them, and I was like, oh, maybe maybe they didn't like me because I was taller than them. Well we'll never truly know, because I never asked them, but it was a pattern that I started to recognize throughout the years, even as I got older. You know, guys tending to have girlfriends who are shorter than them, Like, do guys only go for women who are shorter than them? Are tall women undesirable in the dating world. We're going to answer these questions and more today, so let's get into it. Good morning, everybody, You are currently listening to a Tall Girls podcast hosted by a tall girl named India. I help everyone who is sitting in today is doing super fantastic. Before I get into this episode, I do want to say make sure you follow me on my socials at a Tall Girls podcast, on Instagram, TikTok, and pinture so that you can stay up to date on all of the latest podcast episodes and catch a glimpse of my everyday life. Also, feel free to leave your review and let me know how tall you are. I'm genuinely curious. I also have a monthly newsletter, make sure you subscribe to that. Every single thing is going to be linked in the description, as you can probably tell by the title and the intro. Today we're going to be talking about the dating double standard around height and essentially how height is a factor or how it plays a role in dating. So we're going to start off this episode with a question, did your height ever affect your dating life as a tall woman? Genuinely curious listen. If you have any juicy story times, make sure you drop them in the comments because I want the tea. But in the meantime, let's kick off with this story time. I'm sorry in advance if I offend anybody, but I was personally offended. So I'm going to tell you this story. This is like one of the first dates that I went on his profile it said that he was six foot three. My profile said that I'm five foot nine, because I'm five foot nine. Come to the restaurant and I'm in the parking lot and he was there before me. I parked the car and he already spotted me and comes walking from wherever villa. I don't even know where the frick he came from, and be honest with you, but he's definitely like in running shoes or some kind of flat shoes, and I could tell he's a lot shorter than he said he was. So I'm like going to get out of my car, you know what I mean, opening the door. He's right at my door, by the way, I'm in a sun dress, getting my flip flops on, getting out of the car, like comes in for a hug, and I'm like, not a toucher, like if I don't know you, like I don't know you yet, like we just were talking, like I don't want you in my space. All of a sudden, he backed up away from me, looked me up and down like, oh my god, how tall are you? I'm like, I'm sorry, what how tall are you are you? Like catfishing people like excuse what? Meanwhile, this guy is eye to ee with me, and I just stayed being nice and I was like, no, I'm five foot nine. Uh, it didn't say that anywhere in your profile. It does, and so I didn't want to embarrass him. Even though he just embarrassed me, I was still at that I don't want to make anybody uncomfortable, like yes person phase of you know. I never put him down or said anything, how tall are you? I'm sorry? I apologize. Of course. He's like, I'm like six sixty one, six y two. I couldn't hold it. And I'm like, with your boots on. When I have my boots on, I'm like six to two. I'm like, oh, okay, cool, there's no problem here for me. A nice conversation. I'm thinking, okay, whatever, like I'm already here, just get something to drink or whatever. He's like, I don't date tall girls. Well, okay. I got back in my car and left. I was shocked and I was like really like, oh my god, like maybe I'm never gonna find anybody, because again, this was like when when I first started getting back out on the dating scene. This guy just watch. Mean Pants, and I know he was just projecting. Obviously, don't lie in your dating accounts. If I showed up with my cowboy booth, I would have been towering over him. I asked you guys in a poll over on Instagram and just a quick plug, make sure you're following me at a toll Gross podcast on Instagram so that you can participate in these polls and have your opinions heard in these episodes. But I did ask you, guys, do you think your height has affected your dating life? Sixty five percent of you guys said, oh, yes for sure, twenty five percent said eh, maybe at times, but not really, and ten percent said no, not at all. I'm not gonna lie. Was I expecting different results? Yeah? Why I was expecting different results, I don't know. Maybe I guess because it's twenty twenty five, So I'm here thinking that, you know, people's minds change, people are more open to other people of different heights and so forth and so on. Like, I wasn't expecting most of you guys to say that it affected your dating life. But then again, there's two sides to this. See I probably should have specified. I probably should have specified, because there's kind of two sides to this. It's like the side of okay, like people maybe not approaching you or not preferring you whatever because of your height. But then it's on the flip side, because of your height, you have certain preferences or make certain decisions because of your height. So there's kind of two sides to it. So yeah, yeah, I can. I can kind of get that. And this story time is from the online dating realm, and this kind of brings up two layers when it comes to dating as a tall woman, the online dating world and dating in real life, which the first can ultimately transition into the second one anyways, right, But in the online dating world, I feel like there are a lot or at least a couple of difficulties that come with that. And I'm not really speaking from experience because I've never I've never done online dating like ever buffer starters. We've seen, as we just saw and just heard in the previous clip, that there are people who lie about their height. It's often a pattern with men more likely than not. But Okay, don't get it twisted. There are women out there who do it too, but I'm sure as you know, in lying about your height, then you eventually meet up in person in real life and you're like, oh, like you lied about your height, like you're shorter than what you actually said, Like what's going on? And then it's like red flag, automatically a liar. You lied right off the bat, before we even actually met in person, Like what else are you lying about? You know what I mean? So then there's that, But then there's also kind of like this capability to filter people out based on their height if you have a certain preference or a high preference in your partner. So I mean, oftentimes people do put in their bios. I think they put in their bios like their height with their head. So once you see it round of the bat, you can automatically say, oh, like this person is too tall, or oh this person is too short, or oh this person is taller than I would like, Oh this person is shorter than I would like, and then just move on from there. Or you could kind of bring that up in a conversation when you're talking after I guess you match online or whatever. You can bring that up in the conversation and then you can just be like hmm, maybe not or I don't care. And I feel like people tend to be ruder about it online when it comes to height, Like let's say a woman is like, yeah, I'm like six'. THREE i feel like the person on the other end could potentially be ruder about that then they would in, person BECAUSE i, mean it's not really like a face to face, interaction so there's not that much HUMAN i wouldn't say human interaction because obviously it's too humans communicating, online BUT i feel like communicating in, person like, irl face to face is a little bit more human than communicating through a. Device but that's just my personal. Opinion and because there is that is like less of that human connection or interaction or whatever then you would get in real, life then they're more likely to be rude about it and be, like, oh like you're, ginormous like get out of here or something like. That so they could be ruder in that, sense or they could just you, know straight up ghost the person or ghost the tall. Woman and while we're on the topic of online, dating, y'all there's a dating app for tall people it's called date. UP i see what they did. There so apparently it makes it easier for tall people to find each. Other oh and then it divides people up based on their. Height would you drag this? OUT i redownloaded tender the other. NIGHT i, KNOW i, KNOW i haven't had it in like literally three, years but, Anyway i'm like hinge and. Bumble there's no spot to put your. Height and So i'm a tall, woman SO i put in my Bio i'm tall And i'm bad at math. Whatever and so, far every single matchup gott in the first opening message has been how? Tall And i'm, like, okay that's. Fair LIKE i put it in the bio AND i Saw i'm five to, ten and more than one man has, responded oh, okay thank. GOD i thought being really into hype was like. SUPERFICIAL i thought you guys like didn't. CARE i thought you were pulling the Oh i'm six'. To two if, it matters what happened to? That energy it's different when you come across a. Tall girl huh the energy. Changes let me know in. The comments but then on the, flip side there is the whole in person dating experience as a. Tall woman so now on the, flip side with the in person, dating experience that can have its own set of difficulties. Or STRUGGLES but i will, say that, you know because it's kind of like an in person type, of thing you can kind of tell right off, the bat maybe even before approaching the person whether or not they fit your. Hype preference and, with that it seems like some tall women kind of struggle with that because some men may be too intimidate it because they see their high right off, the bat some men be maybe too intimidated to. Approach, THEM okay i Know that i'm talking a lot about, heterosexual relationships but, then AGAIN that's i feel like where a lot of the struggles as a tall woman comes from or presents itself when it comes. To dating But maybe i'll talk a little bit, more about, you know same sex relationships later in. This episode. We'll see, but anyways back to the previous POINT that i, was making that some men are intimidated by the height of a tall woman and that may cause them to not approach them when it comes to the. Dating scene let's listen to this experience, really quickly just as. An example how come men never approach us, tall baddies like we need some, love too but we don't. Get any LIKE when i, go out men usually stir and they, don't approach or they try and nig because they're. Just INTIMIDATED and I thought i was going crazy OR that i was like ugly, or Something because, i'm like how come men don't approach Me when? I'm OUT and i recently got signed by an Agency, here texas and several of my friends from the modeling agency are over six feet, or taller. And they've kind of said the. Same thing like one of my friends said that she had to start going on the dating apps to even start talking to guys because men would never. Approach her and it's just crazy to me that men don't approach US because us tall baddies are used to, being nagged, put, down whatever so we would, be like we don't even care if, You're shorter like we would be so grateful to. Get, approached no would make us feel. So GOOD so i just don't understand why men just, don't approach, BECAUSE. Like i would. LOVE that i would love it if they, would Approach and i'm, Very SHY so i just don't know how to go about DATING because i don't like the dating apps and men don't. Approach me, so anyways just sharing that thought, And. Listen i'm pretty sure this is not the only experienced us. Out there i'm pretty sure there are a lot of tall women who. Have experiences i'm pretty sure there are a toad women who have experienced this multiple times over and over again throughout. The years and it's kind of a thing of why are some men intimidated to approach a? Taller woman the biggest reason. Is. Insecurity okay height is often seen as a, Masculine trait so for some men it's kind of like an attack on. Their masculinity it's threatening in, a way it makes them feel Less than and going off, OF that i kind of just want, to say just as a little segue, or whatever that that idea is, pretty, bogus, okay because at least in my, personal opinion the idea of masculinity and femininity often comes from. Your vibe it comes from, your energy not necessarily your height or wholeheartedly your. PHYSICAL appearance, i, mean yes your, physical appearance especially the way, you dress can play a part, in that but it also is very dependent on how you come across to. Other people but that's how some men feel and so much So, that okay here's. The thing so there are a tall women out there who have been asked by their partners to not wear heels like, at all just so they're. Not taller and if you're a tall girl and this happens, to you major, red flag run for. The hills i'm sure your long legs could get to. There quickly and, in fact while we're on the topic of red flags or dating red flags as a, Tall woman i'm gonna play this clip for you guys. Really quickly Red flags i've experienced dating as a. Tall woman even if you're, not tall as long as you're around the same height, as him you can probably relate. To this y'all know we're gonna start up, strong heels Asking if i'm gonna wear. Heels tonight i've dated men who, are, like oh you're wearing, heels today or oh you're in reals, heels tonight or damn part you. Wearing heels, i'm, like, oh wow that's such a. Red flag and, You know i'm, a Girl so i'm still gonna, wear heels and it's not something you should ever be questioned when getting someone as a tall woman or dotting someone on the same height. As you this goes into my second, red flag being anxious about being the same height or being taller. Than him this kind of goes back to the point one of. Wearing heels men who are like the same height, as you or when you're typically taller, than them they will constantly be worried about looking the same height or looking shorter than you, in public and that can translate into telling you not to. Wear heels that can translate into gas lighting you to thinking that you're not. That TALL and i think it's a red flag because it shows that they're insecure and they're so worried about what people are thinking about our, high differences or even just me being tall or me not. Being tall third red flag is brings up my height. TOO quickly i don't know what, that's capitalized, but anyway to be, very frank no guy has ever bagged me by talking about my height. Too quickly like you can like. Tall girls but if the first thing you're dming me or tell me is damn like you're tall, as hell it's not. Gonna work already know it's not. Gonna work fourth, red flag and typically the guys who bring up the hight thing will bring up this thing. AS well, Nba, kids, okay listen let's talk. About this do not. Ask me about project and bum do not ask me about. Project whatever and it's not EVEN that i DON'T want, nba kids, you know like kids who are tall like their mom and. Their, Dad Listen project Wembley or wenbeople whatever his name is is on. The way but you can't bring. It UP only i can bring. It up because if you're truly trying to build a relationship, with somebody they're not going to bring this up within the first two seconds of talking. To you like these two things should not be the first couple of things you say. To, ME ever i will not respond. To you and now you've lost a million deal contract because we could have made, it happen but you just rush them, too much doing, Too MUCH like i don't. Like that fifth one is too many, basketball questions like oh, my god like you're supposed to be trying to get to, know me why are you trying to do a your step? Around me and, you know making all these basketball ANALOGIES like i just never found. IT funny i never found. A cue i never thought it. Was, smart like let's let's not do that. To girls please any tree or. OBJECT comparisons i talk about this all. The, time oh like YOU know i don't like climb. The trees you Will ALREADY like i want you people to, know that like to use this one that you will never bag a tobement in. Your life using that you will NEVER and i think you know you won't, bag them so you're just having fun. With IT and i really think THAT'S why i get to our nerves because like we know you're not. Being serious you're actually still trying to like make comments about, our height and you know you're not trying to see, bag on so you make the WHOLE well i want to climb, that tree chop that chair to address them, like. That please, last one last red flag kind of goes back to, number two sizing. Me Up like i've been on dates with, men who like you can tell that they are intimidated by, your stature like they're constantly looking at your shoulders or like your head and like seeing like. Who's taller don't, Do that you're not going back no taller men. Doing that, But yeah i'm sure that you've heard that men typically prefer. Shorter women, that is honestly what's said in the. Dating world whether OR not i agree is a. Different story or whether or not that's the, actual case that's a. Different, story okay we like to take things in a case by, Case matter but for the, most part there are people who believe that men prefer. Shorter women why is this? The case why do men prefer prefer women who are shorter? Than them there are honestly a lot of reasons across. The board some men see short women as more feminine, and nurturing maybe a, bit passive even the whole. Sculinity THING as i. Mentioned before some like to say that it kind of balances each other out when one partner is taller than. The other but then it's also the same reason why there are some women, out there or even some tall women, out there who prefer, taller men or men who are at least taller. Than them everybody has their. Own preferences everybody is entitled to their. Own preferences and, you know that's not really something to get. Pressed about it's not really something. TO take i wouldn't say, take seriously but, take personally, you KNOW because, i, mean ultimately it really doesn't have much of anything to do with you as. A person it's just that. Person's preference it's just when people are rude, about it or make rude comments, about it or say mean things about it, to you, or, say oh you're never going to find anyone because of, your height that's when it's. An issue but when they just personally prefer someone at a, certain height it's kind of like you can't do much of anything, about it you KNOW what? I, MEAN now a tadbit about saying SEX, relationships akaa women. Loving women i'm not SAYING that i don't have too much to say, about THIS but I just i don't know too much, About IT like i personally don't have experience with it myself and even in my life, in general like with other people, Around Me like i've just been surrounded more so by heterosexual relationships for the, most part or men loving MEN like i when it comes to women, loving. WOMEN don't i don't know too much, about that to be quite honest. With, you however after doing research literally just tak Talk, and reddit it seems like some women do have. Their preferences take a listen to. These clips My. Tallm zach can we just talk about how hard it is to date as a? Tall fem first, of all can we just collectively stop trying to change straight girls and maybe just date the fems that are? Out THERE because i. Swear, To god i'm a, tall GIRL so i need someone who's at least, my height maybe a couple, Inches Shorters like i'm, Like five i'm pushing five. To, ten okay if you're ie level, with me. THAT'S perfect i FEEL like i am very much a good height to be. A female i'm, five. Eight y'all. Be one us used to be six. Plus feet, come on, come on, be. FUNNY y'all i see it. SO much a lot of times, people, say oh you. Too short. If, five eight it should, be perfect it should. Be perfect, come on that is. Not bad five eight is. Actually great, and yes while some women do have, Their preferences i've actually seen a couple of Times on reddit that some people argue that straight women tend to care more about height than queer women or lesbian women or. BISEXUAL women i, don't know they're just saying that straight women care more. About height that's essentially the point. Being made but if you have anything else to say, About that feel free to let me know and. Educate us all, in all love. Is love whoever, you're into go. For. It okay there are tall women out there who have, you know dated or even married men who are shorter. Than them quick. Shout, out okay quick shout out to six Foot of Bay. On instagram she proudly shows her man and her man is visibly clearly shorter, than her and they both love each other and they both it's just a very very, beautiful. Relationship y'all they are. So happy THEY have i think like two or three, kids together and they're just living their best lives on. The, gram okay that is just a clear example that, you know if somebody wants to be, with you they're gonna want to be, with you. Heighten all it doesn't matter if, they're taller it doesn't matter if. They're shorter if they're, into you then they're. Into you and, you know that just really goes to show that whoever is meant to, find you whoever is meant to, love you they are going to love you for all. Of You. Heighten, All OKAY as i, said, before yes people have, their preferences but there are other people who don't care. About height there are other people out there who actually prefer some like there are men out there who may prefer women who are taller. Than them There are i'm out there who may prefer men who are shorter. Than them it really like there's something. For everyone there's someone, for everyone is Basically what i'm trying. To say but if people are rude, about it if people are rude about, your height they are clearly not meant, for, You okay and that just brings you one step closer to finding the person who you are meant to. BE with i did ask you guys in a poll Over, on instagram specifically to the, tall ladies would you date someone shorter? Than you fifty five percent of you guys, SAID yep i LIKE what, i like and forty five percent said. Heck no and, you know one of you guys actually did hit, me up did dm me based on that pole or? Whatever Saying because i'm gonna talk about it because it's actually relevant To what i'm about to. Say afterwards one of you, guys said my fiance is five Eleven and i'm five eleven and. A half, So yeah and the REASON why i wanted to bring that up IS because i personally feel like the ones, who, SAY yeah i LIKE what. I like it depends on how, much shorter because five eleven and a five eleven and, a half that's not that much of, a difference you KNOW what. I mean for the. Most part there's, obviously outliers there's obviously other people out there who have different preferences. Or whatever but for the, MOST part i feel like an inch or two shorter is not that bad for most. Of us most of us wouldn't mind because we. Get it we get that. We're tall we understand that, we're tall and that's just how. It is so an inch or, two, shorter maybe, you know it's not too crazy if we're getting to five six. SEVEN inches a lot OF us i don't think we would even consider. That person but that's. Just me that's just. My opinion let me know if you think. Anything, DIFFERENT now i want to leave you. With this tell women. Are stunning. That's it that's LITERALLY all i wanted. To, say now whatever you do with that information is up. To, You anyways thank you so much guys for tuning into. THIS episode i really, appreciate IT and i appreciate you, as always, of course feel free to hit me up on my socials At A tall girls podcast and let me know what you thought about. This episode do? You agree do you disagree WITH what i said in terms of people honestly just have their. OWN preferences i don't think it's a thing, Of y'all like all men prefer women who are shorter, than them and all women prefer men who are taller, than them and so forth and so on when it comes to. Heterosexual relationships and, you know if you have anything else to say about the same sex relationships aka women loving, WOMEN like i. DON'T know I just i want to hear. Your thoughts let me know in, the comments let me know in, my dms as long as, it's appropriate, Of course and Until then i'll catch y'all in the. Next one good night. And goodbye